Friday, March 23, 2007

Break a deal, face the wheel!


I used to work loss prevention on a contractor basis for a few stores, and I couldn't tell you how many little idiot teenage girls I'd catch stealing makeup. Then of course, they'd try to bargain with you in hopes their budding female wiles would work and you'd let them go.

From The Statesman:

Authorities have charged a department store loss prevention officer with seeking sex from a 16-year-old girl after he found her shoplifting, according to court documents. Ryan Keith Johnson, 26, is charged with indecency with a child, a second-degree felony, and faces up to 20 years in prison if convicted.

An arrest affidavit said Johnson told the girl that she had enough merchandise to be charged with a felony and that, "If you have sex with me right now, your record will be clean" during the March 7 incident at Kohl's on U.S. 290 in Sunset Valley.

The girl then performed a sex act on Johnson in the loss prevention office, the document said. Investigators said in the affidavit that they later interviewed Johnson, who told conflicting stories about his encounter with the girl.


Authorities said witness interviews gave them enough evidence to charge Johnson.

I'll say this for the dumbasses out there in loss prevention, or corrections, or police work:

Never, NEVER, give somebody who likes doing illegal or stupid things the ability to get your ass tossed in the clink. Criminals always have another agenda at work; even silly little shoplifting teenagers love the idea of tossing "the man" in jail for a few years. The crazy biatches just love to see the world revolve around them for a while, and they get LEGIT victim status - they usually play the part anyway, so why not go for the gold?

In shorter terms: if the words "Have sex with me/give me a BJ/similar and I'll let you go" ever escape your lips, you've earned your jail time.

Stupid has its price, and it's often several years in jail and permanent sex offender status.

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