We're all going to die from SNOW POISONING!

OK John Campbell from ABC affiliate KETV here in Omaha predicted yesterday that Omaha would be seeing three to six inches of snow on Thursday.

"Here's the rub though... the models are going gang-busters with the snow here. Using some equations, giving us 14 inches. However, I think that's definitely over doing it... I think we'll see a swath of 3 to 6 inches. 6 inch totals are probably a good bet here in Omaha and in Lincoln. Some spots around Omaha might end up with an inch or so more.

This is NOT three to six inches of snow:

This is also NOT three to six inches of snow:

Those were taken at about 10:30 AM. It's still coming down hard. The latest posting there on Mr. Wizard's blog, as of 11:29 AM, says there will be six to nine inches of snow.

There's at least six to nine inches of snow right now just in my boots.

Jamie rushed out to get to work on time. She was the only person in the office as of 8:30 AM. She forgot to grab more than a pop-tart to eat. Although the minivan is usually great for driving in snow, Jamie herself almost got into two accidents, and got stuck for 25 minutes on a hill behind some idiot. My wife's employer (who decided that raises for nobody but upper management made sense this year) has a strict "There is no such thing as a snow day" policy. Her immediate boss didn't even bother to try to make it in.

But Jamie is there.

She will probably be there all day.

And management has decided to "try to get some pizza place to deliver."

Idiots.

If I'm the upper-management guy for a multi-million dollar company that provides underwriting services and so on for California businesses, and although there's a BLIZZARD outside some of my 12 dollar an hour workers actually made it to work....what would I do? Try half-heartedly to order a few pizzas, knowing that it's not really sensible to go out to eat for lunch today?

Nope!

I would tell everyone to sit tight and ask them not to leave for lunch. I would get my ass into my SUV. I would drive to a supermarket, restaurant, whatever is open - there are a few options that are fairly close to the building. I would spend a whole wad of cash on some food, something good. I would load all that food into my SUV and drive it back to my workers, who by showing up to work today under adverse conditions, are enabling my business to CONDUCT business. I would tell the workers that bothered to show up that my boss appreciates them, that I appreciate them, and that millions of illegal immigrant workers collecting unemployment in California appreciate them. I would tell them that food is on me as long as the conditions outside suck, and that if anyone felt they couldn't make it home, I would make sure they got there before *I* went home. After that, I would take the rest of upper management and go brush the snow off all my employees' cars.

But that's just me.

And now, a picture of my son looking smug.